Monday, October 31, 2005

Halloween at foo's house

In the spirit of Halloween I thought that I would report on the my trick o’ treaters. We had a pretty good showing this year. About 40 in all. For the most part, they were greedy little monsters who showed no remorse as they clawed their way past each other to my precious treat bowl. For the most part, the phrase “trick o’ treat” was just a formality and many of them didn’t even finish the sentence before their mitts were wrist-deep in my candy. Some of the greedy little bastards took numerous candy bars… I usually simply answered with a look of disgust. I tried not to get to upset, because, if you are a fan of Jerry Sinfield you know that candy is the single greatest thing for kids.

“Friends, family, school…These were all just obstacles in the way of getting more candy”

It is basically their only modivation to stay alive. So, I can’t get too mad at them. And if they are going to risk being yelled at by their neighbors, well I guess I have to commend their bravery. I told one kid “just one” and she promptly thrust her hand in and grabbed at least three Hershey bars. I repeated “just one” and she ran off. I guess she knows how to work the system... Good for her.

There was one kid with a “ghostly clown” costume on. It was a bedsheet and rainbow afro-wig. Man, what a lame-o. Maybe she was supposed to be the ghost of that 3:16 guy. I accidentally made fun of some junior-high aged kid for having a pillowcase for their candy bag. I just said “Oh…Pillowcase!” in a fake-impressed tone. I didn't mean to, it just happened.

Lets all share our best and worst costume (this includes adulthood). I’ll start out. I think my best was last year when I went as a knock-off of the cop from Reno 911(somewhere on my blog), and I think my worst was the mummy my brother makes fun of me for. My mom wrapped me in gauze from work and it fell off and I looked like an idiot. You could clearly see whatever clothes I was wearing underneath, so I guess I just looked like a normal kid with a drunk mom. That may tie for when I went as a backstreet boy in college. That was so lame that I am embarrised when i think about it.

Also make sure to report on any reportable happenings when trick o’ treaters came to your house.

Comments:
My lamest costume was the queen of hearts playing card. i wore a big cardboard card over a sweatsuit. i was very embarrassed to wear it, but it was the most decent one my mom was willing to pay for and well, like Tim says, it IS all about the candy so I sucked it up. tim has been handling the trick or treaters---i have been eating the candy.
 
When I was about 5, my mom dressed me up as Dolly Parton. I remember it as my worst costume, the boobs were cardboard mounds/cones and they itched like crazy. However, as i look back at pictures it was definetly the best costume, pink bellbottoms with tassel poms at the ends, a blond afro, and tons of makeup.

That same year my sister was a ghost with her face painted white. As we were leaving she saw herself in a mirror and started crying hysterically which significantly delayed my candy collecting. So I guess my sister's ghost costume was my worst costume.
 
my best one was my robot costume in first grade that mom made for me out of big brown cardboard boxes. there was one that went from my neck to my ankles and another that was taped to my head. there were some eye holes, but they were not well placed and i could only see the tops of trees. it had a bunch of dials and gauges drawing on with magic marker and a couple other doo-dads stuck on.

it became my worst costume when people kept thinking that i was a garbage compactor. then i fell down in the muddy lot across the street. there i was - laying face down in a puddle of muck and i couldnt move or get up. why? because i was wearing a box!

btw - your worse costume was not the mummy. it was the time that we made you look like some kind of decomposing thing with some sort of flour based concoction that we smeared on you. it was disgusting and smelled bad as well. it looked like you vomited on yourself. you are lucky that a pack of dogs didnt get after you...
 
paulie, you could've just worn the mullet for halloween! :) hee hee! i kid, i kid!
 
i'm sorry for the mullet comment paulie, i was just remembering the picture that was shared at the dinner table one night of you as a very young lad and thought it was cute. i hope i haven't made you cry. :(
 
The horrible thing is.... i can't remember a single costume from my life except for yesterdays (i was Egon from the ghostbusters).......
 
I can't really remember any either. I think I usually just wore some kind of mask that made it hard to talk or breath and got all sweaty. In highschool no one had halloween parties. In college I was always playing in a volleyball tournament on Halloween weekend so I didn't get to dress up.
 
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