mindsquirt

On a recent trip to the grocery store, I noticed for the first time that there was a cartoon Viking on a package of bacon. He was winking as if he was approving of me buying his meat. I was confused about seeing a Viking as a bacon mascot, but then I saw the bacon fork and the “That’s-a spicy meatball-a” gesture and then I knew he was a bacon-loving Viking, which makes perfect sense. So I bought some. I think the marketing company really won that little battle.

Here is how I think their product mascot meeting went:

Boss: “We have 60 seconds before lunch to figure out a likable and recognizable mascot for Plumrose Bacon”
Bob: “A pirate with a chef hat on!”
Sally: “a rapping elephant eating bacon!”
Fred: “An Eskimo on a sled pulled by bacon strips!”
Sally: “An astronaut on the planet bacon!”
Fred: “a winking Italian Viking with a fork..."

Boss: “Done! What about the motto?”
Bob: “We will pillage your taste buds and brutally murder your hunger for bacon.”
Boss: “Done!”

Anyway, some time passed and I forgot all about the bacon Viking. Then some more time passed and I started thinking it was odd that there was a Viking on a package of bacon. Then some more time passed and I doubted it happened at all.

Then I was driving on I-65 and a semi passed me with a picture of the bacon Viking but no pictures of bacon.

When I returned to work the next day, I was still confused. When I thought about it, I wasn’t sure if that bacon was involved at all. The Viking could have been the mascot for shoe polish or lemon drops. I would have googled it, but I wasn’t able to really remember the exact name brand on that truck or on the package so I couldn't look it up.

It really bothered me for some reason. Was there such thing as the bacon-loving-viking?

I even emailed my friends to try to get some answers:

“When you guys buy bacon, have you ever seen the mascot on the bacon packaging that looks like a Viking that is winking and doing that “that’sa spicy meatball” think with his fingers?

What brand is that?”

I eventually tried to get to the bottom of it via Google*. After 20 minutes, I got desperate and started putting in phrases involving bacon and Vikings.

I couldn't find sqaut...

I even used ham instead of bacon. I still couldn't find jack! I tried many possibilites and it started getting pretty absurd, and when I checked my search history I found this list that might terminate my position if my boss ever saw it:


1) bacon Viking
2) ham Viking
3) ham brands
4) bacon brands
5) ham mascots
6) bacon mascots
7) Viking mascots
8) A Viking eating bacon
9) Winking ham Viking
10) Winking Viking who eats ham
11) Winking Viking who eats bacon
12) Viking with a chef hat on who eats ham
13) Is that a Viking chef on the ham package?
14) Why is there a Viking on that ham?


Man, I do love that list. I have read it at least a dozen times and still LOL. I am glad to have shared it with you. If you aren't laughing, please say #14 out loud until you do so.

*I did find the motto of Hillshire farms: “Go Meat!”
http://www.gomeat.com/