mindsquirt

Let me preface this blog by saying that I am not trying to be immature or distasteful due to the topic. I want to discuss an important topic and it just-so-happens to involve poop. Because I don’t want to seem crass, and the fact that I am eating lunch right now, I will refer to poop as “cable” and the act of defecation as “layin’ cable”.

Last week I was at work and I remembered back into the 1st-3rd grade time frame. Back then, there was an awful lot of cable lying around in places it shouldn’t be. I remember more than one occasion I would walk into the school bathroom and there would be some cable in the urinal or in the sink. At the time, I remember it being a little gross, but I would mostly just avoid it and go about my business. It seemed out of place, but nothing to get alarmed about. I was a kid, and I guess I didn’t know any better not to freak-out or start psycho-analyzing the type of kid that would lay cable in the sink.

However, when looking back, Holy Jesus! Why was there cable in the sink?!! My mind swims when I think of any reason why a 1-3 grade kid would lay cable in the sink or urinal.

Last week when I was thinking of it, I had a lot of questions. Was it just one kid? Is this common, does it happen in other schools? Do girls do it too? Do many young children go through a stage where they lay cable in the sink? Are they doing it to be bad, or just because they are confused? Do they lay their cable in a conventional manner, and then move it to the sink? Or do they actually put their butt in the sink or urinal and lay it there? Is this some kind of behavior that stems from an obsession, abuse, or stress from home? Where these kids little sociopaths? Where are these people now, are they still doing socially unacceptable and unhygenic things?

I was going to blog about this last week, and ask everyone if they remember spotting any cable in their bathrooms at that age. And if so, why they think it was there... but....

Ironically, over the weekend, I was at a party and I met a person who laid cable in a urinal when he was a kid! I don’t know how it came up, but once I realized he wasn’t kidding, I started hitting him with the questions. I asked him if he knew it was “bad”. He said yes, he did, but he also acted like he was a little confused back then. He went on to say that he lived in Malaysia as a little kid, and over there people have different toilet etiquette.

Then he came back to America and shit in a urinal.

He is most likely the exception to the rule. So again, I really wonder about this. Anyone remember this kind of thing going on? Anyone have any insight?