Tuesday, January 31, 2006

i want 1 rib

what follows is a pretty funny exchange between President Bush and a reporter (Q) in 2004. It is funny because president bush just acts like a smartass the whole time. and if he is being sincere, it is much funnier if you pretend he is just giving this reporter a hard time. do that.

it is almost like a SNL sketch, although this would be the type of thing that they would do to parody Clinton and his visit to McDonalds...

the original link is here

THE PRESIDENT: I need some ribs.
Q Mr. President, how are you?
THE PRESIDENT: I'm hungry and I'm going to order some ribs.
Q What would you like?
THE PRESIDENT: Whatever you think I'd like.
Q Sir, on homeland security, critics would say you simply haven't spent enough to keep the country secure.
THE PRESIDENT: My job is to secure the homeland and that's exactly what we're going to do. But I'm here to take somebody's order. That would be you, Stretch -- what would you like? Put some of your high-priced money right here to try to help the local economy. You get paid a lot of money, you ought to be buying some food here. It's part of how the economy grows. You've got plenty of money in your pocket, and when you spend it, it drives the economy forward. So what would you like to eat?
Q Right behind you, whatever you order.
THE PRESIDENT: I'm ordering ribs. David, do you need a rib?
Q But Mr. President --
THE PRESIDENT: Stretch, thank you, this is not a press conference. This is my chance to help this lady put some money in her pocket. Let me explain how the economy works. When you spend money to buy food it helps this lady's business. It makes it more likely somebody is going to find work. So instead of asking questions, answer mine: are you going to buy some food?
Q Yes.
THE PRESIDENT: Okay, good. What would you like?
Q Ribs.
THE PRESIDENT: Ribs? Good. Let's order up some ribs.
Q What do you think of the democratic field, sir?
THE PRESIDENT: See, his job is to ask questions, he thinks my job is to answer every question he asks. I'm here to help this restaurant by buying some food. Terry, would you like something?
Q An answer.
Q Can we buy some questions?
THE PRESIDENT: Obviously these people -- they make a lot of money and they're not going to spend much. I'm not saying they're overpaid, they're just not spending any money.
Q Do you think it's all going to come down to national security, sir, this election?
THE PRESIDENT: One of the things David does, he asks a lot of questions, and they're good, generally.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

pancake sandwich afterglow

here are the faces that alex makes after drinking some breastmilk out of a bottle.

she looks in pain here, but it is actually moments before a smile.It is difficult to capture the shear bliss in her face with these picures. immediately after a long feeding, she is so tired she closes her eyes and goes limp and smiles like crazy. her head is at about 30 degrees.

Like many new fathers, I sometimes have doubts that my baby is in fact mine. After eating a generous serving of pancake n' bacon sandwich this morning I have gotten over my doubts and here is why:

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

for your enjoyment

It has recently come to my attention that some of you might be taking some of the things I say seriously. Here is some helpful advice for enjoying my blog:

Never take anything I say seriously at any time. Half of what I say is made up, the rest is embellishment, holkem, and hogwash.

Cooper does not lead a glamerous socalite lifestyle, this has become a running joke to myself and I doubt it is funny to anyone but me. I guess it is funny b/c he is a normal dog and he has no concept of such trivial and vapid things that we seem to think are important these days, and it is funny to me to think he is obesessed with it. All he cares about is peanut butter. he is also quite fond of cheetoes lately.

hot tub skills

If you want to see some survival skills, go here. otherwise, check out my hot tub skills:

I got wind of free hot tubs ripe for the plucking at walnut ridge in Clarksville. They sell lots of ourdoorsey and indoor recreational stuff such as billiards tables, card tables, pools, and hot tubs. Anyway, this was about 2 months ago. My dad, brother, and I went there and quickly pounced on the free tubs. The place needed to get rid of them because they were trade-ins, and I guess not valuable enough to be re-sold.

Most of the tubs were in various states of disrepair, in fact, so I know that there was some work that needed to be done from the get-go. I got a 4-seater Jacuzzi that was nice and deep. While I was there, I noticed some old dirty derelict air-hockey tables, so I snatched one of those too! I also got a old huge cantilevered umbrella, but it was slightly used. I put those in storage. My friend and I transported the hot tub up here, and my work on it started.

Before I detail that work, I should mention that I spent no more than $500 on this tub. In it’s heyday, this tub would cost a razzeling $5000. Defiantly money I don’t have. Here is what I spend that $500 on:

~$100 on a cover.
~$150 on 50 amp interior and exterior wire, and the sub panel GFI* (see pic #4)
~$50 plumbing
~$50 insulation
~$30 transporting the tub 100 + miles (gas money)
~$20 15 amp wire and miscellaneous
~$100 on chemicals for maintaining clean water*

* These materials I would have to have bought even if I bought a brand new tub, so the true price of this tub is $250.

So, unless this tub depreciated 90% or more since it was brand-new, I think I got a good deal.

front of tub, shows skimmer, control panel, and some plumbing that was repaired.


Immediately I noticed some slice marks in the flex pvc in areas 1, 2a, and 2b (click on the pic above). I think the dealer said that the trade-ins had to be damaged for some reason. This flex pvc were the jet lines into the tub. It was obvious that they had to be repaired. At the time, all of the cuts had enough space to use a simple repair coupler. I did this while the tub was at my parent’s house, and left it there for two weeks. I also hooked it up electrically, and it immediately tripped the GFI breaker. I also filled it up and noticed that two of my repairs leaked. I transported it to my house, (thanks dan!)
The leak were in area 2b and 1. This was a great fear of mine, b/c after those initial repairs, I knew I had to rebuild the entire assembly that you see in 1 and 2b. this was a lot of work. It is hard to see, b/c I filled in and around assembly #1 with “great-stuff” to lend some strain relief to the bottom of the filter box. (this is the thing surrounded in Styrofoam, which seemed to have thin walls) The entire assembly #1 consisted of 2 90s, a “t”, and a coupler, all in tight quarters. 2b also leaked. 2b was a weird assembly. If you notice, it is a regular “t”. the bottom of it plugs directly into a flange that threaded on to the output of one of the pumps. The top reduced to a ¾” flex pvc. So I had to buy a 2” to 3/4“ reducer, something I have never seen. The part of the t heading to the left, simply went to a piece of 2”, which went behind the control box(#3) (and included two 45s). There also was a simple fix with the plumbing where there was two pipes linked together with a screw-in thingie and some ¼ or so tubing. I don’t know it’s purpose but it leaked.

My dad came to my house and helped me on this plumbing horsemarm. Thanks dad! He is a much better plumber than I.


I am no stranger to electrician stuff. I have wired up more than one house in its entirety and did countless repairs and add-in circuits. So, I felt pretty comfortable with this hot tub electrically. What you will see is how sassy this hot tub really was.

Area 3 on the picture above was the control box. It has 5 external things it turns off and on via some relays (the yellow things inside there); 2 pumps, a blower, a ozone generator, and a light. You will notice on the bottom right 5 plugs going to them. Now, when I unplugged the blower from there, the GFI didn’t blow. This was a small victory for me, b/c I knew it wasn’t something terrible that was wrong. At that point, I was convinced it was my blower that was shorted, so alls I had to do was to replace it. Bada-bing, bada-boom. I later took it out so I could spec it, and I decided to hook up an multimeter to it, just to make sure it was shorted out. I did that, and it read 3 ohms. I then called my brother, who measured his, which was also 3 ohms. I was stumped. Further, when I plugged it directly into a 110 outlet, it worked. This ruled out a short, and thus the blower to blame. I knew one thing for sure, it only seemed to act crazy when the blower was plugged into the control board. I noticed that all 110 devices were passi ng through transformers, except for the blower. That was very curious, but I was still at a loss. Eventually I called Jacuzzi and told them the story. A guy there said that sometimes people hook up the GFI wrong. Even though it was clearly a problem with the GFI, I ruled this out as I thought that there would be no possible way that I would honk-up something so simple. Turns out, I did. If you look at the below picture, it will show you how not to hook up a GFI. This GFI came with a white pigtail (a short length of wire) already hooked up to that neutral bar up on the top right of the box. I did the human thing (didn’t read the directions) and hooked the incoming and outgoing white wires to it. Now, if I would have read the directions it would have told me to stick the white wire going to the hot tub directly into the GFI where the screw terminal is, similar to the way the red and black wires are. Whoops. That really explained why a 110 device tripped it and 220 devices were fine! The white wire (neutral, part of a 110 circuit!) was not an input to the GFI circuit!!!!

problem solved bitches.

how to wire up a 220 VAC GFI incorrectly


Over-Insulating this hottub really worked out well. before I insulated it, the hot tub would drop from about 100 degrees to about 90 in 24 hours. Now, it drops from about 100 degrees to about 95 degrees in 24 hours. That doesn’t sound like a lot, but it is considering how much thermal mass we are talking about here. To insulate it, I bought some 2” rigid foam board. You can see the before and after on the first picture. The factory insulation was sprayed on expanding foam that coats the tub, it is that dirty yellow color in the middle of the picture. The bright white insulation is stuff I stuck on there. I covered the skimmer box you see on the right of the first picture, and I cut a huge piece for the entire side of the picture you see directly below. Of course, it is covered by that wood so you can’t see it. I also stuffed in some bats of fiberglass insulation here-and-there. You can see one on the left of the first picture and on the second to last picture. I tried to do that where I could get good coverage but not around the pumps. I really tried to cover a lot of the pipes that go to the jets, that were not covered by the factory insulation at all. In the last picture below, you can see some rigid foam that came from the factory. This is the side opposite the control box side. I left that in and stuffed some bat insulation in as well. I also used some “great stuff” spray insulation and put that under some of the pipes to a) provide some strain relief for components connected to them (see first picture on left and right), and b) get some of the flex PVC off of the cold ground. After that, I put on the panels and started to enjoy my hot tub! The finished product is what you see in the last picture!

It is very glamerous. sometimes i pretend i am a moviestar when I am in it. Cooper doesn't get in it. He says it will dry his skin and he has to look his best for a glam Hollywood gayla he is invited to this weekend.

side of tub, you can see the control panel on the right side (which is the front).

back of tub, shows factory rigid foam and some bat insulation behind it.

Finished tub, how glamerous!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

being a good consumer ii

last weekend was great. for the first time in a long time, my wife and alex and I just layed around the house and did nothing. it was pretty boring, but refreshing. it seems like I am always doing a chore, studying, working on my thesis, or traveling on the weekend. so that was dope. one thing we did do before the weekend was go to babies r us, and bought a stroller for our babe. we were in there with an odd, but helpful salesman who offered to sit in the stroller for us. he did, and it didn't break.

he wouldn't let me push him around though. that guy was creepy. he looked like he should be in jail for some kind of sexual crime. i don't like that in a babies r us employee. i later saw him on a bike. i am not sure if it had ever been used in a crime. he was unkept and easily excited, like when he wanted to sit in the stroller for us, i think that is what was so unsettling about him.

anyway,we were in there for about 2.5 hours vacillating between different styles of strollers. the problem was we had to choose one heavy and expensive stroller that would last her from now until toddlerhood, or buy one while she was an infant, and then another when she was older. the cost of both of those two or one "universal" one were the same. even though it was a bit heavy, we got the "universal" one.

it was a brutal choice. we had the wife test putting it in the trunk before we bought it, and even put the kiddo in (we took her out first before putting in the trunk).

sorry about the lack of blogs. i am working on one for my hottub, one for the tile floor i am currently working on, and one about cooper's glamerous trip to the golden globes.

the IU v. illionis came last night was crazy good. I was glad they pulled that off.

alex is smiling now. i can get her to smile pretty regularly. here is a cute picture:

Friday, January 13, 2006

public service announcement


I would like to make an addendum to my last post. See, I was talking about the perks of taking a multivitamin because they contain chrominum. I read yesterday in Newsweek some interesting things along these lines. To make a long story short, there was a panel of nutritionists who wrote about nutrition (imagine that!) The one think that they all basically agreed on (besides excersize and a high whole-grain, veg and friut diet) was taking a multivitamin. Many also said that many americans should take supplimentry fish oil pills (omega-3). So, i think i might do this. if you are reading this, you should to. They boasted postive affects such as decreased chances of cancer, heart disease, obesty, and degenerative disease such as alheimers.

there also was a article about doing excersize that strenghens your "core" muscles that can help muscle pain in your extremeties. this might be interesting to those of you who had to spend the holidays on an air matress.

If you are interested in more you should buy the copy of it.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

this n that


I don't have much content this time folks. i have been busy polishing my thesis manuscript and spending time with my wife and baby girl. she went to the doctor and she is coming along swimmingly! she is above the national average of weight. and cuteness. my thesis is upwards of 200 pages (1.5 space) . about 70 pages of that is code. i hate it all now, so don't ask me about it. no, i don't hate it, but i could seriously do without talking about it. I should be starting a new job here soon. It is a mixed blessing. I will be finally be making the big bucks, but I will be chained to a desk, something I haven’t experienced in a long time. but that is much better than being chained to a book or project like I am now, or when I was a teacher. I am pretty sure I rather do anything then teach again. That sucked real bad.

I started taking a cellular physiology class on monday. it is already interesting. it is going to be pretty tough though, b/c i am in there with physiology grad students, and there is all of these high expectations. i am really out of my milieu. We haven’t covered deja vu yet. Although my prof talked about some of the experiments he is running. he says that a lot of disease such as cancer, diabetes, and Alzheimer’s is due to some phenomena in the cell membrane. That seems a little glib to me, but who knows? He said that chromium is supposted to help this, which is in multivitamins. So, it probably wouldn’t be a bad idea to take one. I think I am, based on this. it wouldn’t hurt me anyway, and they are cheap.
I went to the grocery on monday. I really had my cart going fast as hell. I tried to push it as fast as I could get it, and then I jumped on. I think I was going about 40 mph but I am not sure.

check this story out:

I got my foodstuffs and was loading them into my car, I noticed that this guy was doing his duty and taking his cart to the cart area. but, instead of taking it to the designated cart area, he put it in the middle of a vacant car spot next to my car. I was discusted, the cart area was the next spot over! he would have had to take at most 6 extra steps. I myself, am always very polite and take my cart to the proper area, as not to disrupt the ease of parking, and make it easy for the cart-boys to collect them. It is a ordered system and i respect that. Sometimes, if they are very far away, i put them in between cars so people can still get in and out. I justify this by blaming the store for making the cart areas too spread out.

anyhoo, after i saw him do this, i was sorta put off, until I noticed he was (slowly) heading for his car parked in a handicap spot. I then understood that this guy was handicapped and he was probably in pain when he walked. on my way home, i thought about it further. should have this guy taken the 6 extra (possibly painful) steps as a courtesy to everyone else? He was driving a car, so he couldn't be that bad. it seems like if he was really in that much pain, he could have just left his cart by his car, between cars, as to make the space available, but he put it in the middle of a spot for another car! it is my belief that he started walking to the cart area and just said the hell with it, and left the cart in a spot. Or maybe he was trying to screw with the non-handicap people, in an act of jealousy.

anyway, i can't decide if this guy was lazy, or if his actions were justified. all, let me know your stance based on what i said.

I put the cart in the proper cart area after he left. Good for me.

Monday, January 02, 2006

No, YOU update my blog!

In the spirit of having a sparse blog, I thought I would not update my blog again today.

Instead I decided to blog a blog, but provide no real substance.

The end.

Well...I'll give you something:

I am submitting my thesis to my committee on the 10th, defense on the 31st. I have much more time on my hands now that my thesis horsemarm is winding down. I have tried to spend as much as possible with my new daughter and the wife, and that lovable scamp of a pup, Cooper.

I got a used hot tub for free about 2 months ago. I have been working on fixing some of the problems with it, but i have waited to blog about it until then, when i can document it with pictures n' such. you are in for a real treat then.

the other night we thought we heard someone knocking on the door at about 4 in the morning, it was quite a scare. It turned out to be no one. I got out my non-loaded shotgun nonetheless.

We didn't do much for new year's eve, but we did get a visitor in the form of a teenage meth-addict who needed to use the phone and needed a ride to jail. Well, actually she said she was going to have to go to jail that night and I offered to "give her a ride to jail". She was witness to our lame antics on new year's eve (trivial pursuit). I like to think that in her meth-induced state, she hallucinated the whole thing. That would be far out. I also like to think that she hallucinated Cooper asking her to get the peanut butter down and slather it on a piece of summer sausage for him.

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