Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Visit to the Robo-psychotherapist 2

Hi.
I am in a slump at work. I am pretty bored here for the most part. The job is challenging, and I am learning a fair amount of useful stuff, and the pay and benefits are decent, but it is not quick-pace enough for me. Anyway, I decided to go to the Robo-psychotherapist to vent my frustration. This time, I knew what to expect. Not like last time. (if you haven't read about my first visit, visit that link)

Here is what happened (psychotherapist is in red) :
---------------------------------------------------
I am the psychotherapist. Please, describe your problems. Each
time you are finished talking, type RET twice.


I find this job incredibly boring.

Why do you say you find this job incredibly boring?

it isn't challenging, and my boss is rarely around. i need to be
nurtured, ya know.

What makes you believe you might want to be nurtured?

because I fantasize during work hours about cuddling with my boss

Is it because you fantasize during work hours about cuddling with
your boss that you came to me?


well, no.

Earlier you said you would like to be nurtured?

yes, but not by you. let’s not talk about that. i am more
worried about how boring my job is. the mere fact that i am
talking to you instead of working, indicates this.

Does it bother you that you are talking to I instead of working
might indicate that?

I think you have your pronouns use confused. yes, it bothers me.

Maybe your plans have something to do with this.

....

Can you elaborate on that?

well, i don't know what you are getting at here.

Are you sure that that?

what what?

You mentioned that you fantasize during work hours about cuddling
with your boss?


yes, why are we dwelling on this?

When did you first know that are you dwelling on this?

No, you are dwelling on it. Look, I take it back, okay? I just said that to be funny.

Is it because of your life that you are going through all this?

maybe

I would appreciate it if you would continue.

Well, maybe this has more to do with my problem with stealing my
co-workers lunches from the fridge.

I don't understand.

well, i am so bored at work, i take bites of their sandwiches and
put them back. there has been emails circulating...

Do you really think you would like to be nurtured?

what about sandwiches? Why are we still talking about that?

How does it feel to want?


I dunno. needy?

How do you reconcile the people you hang around with?

I have just recently stopped taking bites of their food when they are not looking. That has helped.

Earlier you said you are talking to I instead of working might indicate that?

Yes, I think that really shows how unmotivated I am to work.
Instead of working, I am talking to you, a computer program that
picks out clauses from my typing, and uses them to simulation a
helpful discussion, in the guise of therapy. It is sad, really.

Perhaps this has something to do with any hobbies you have?

I enjoy outwitting computer programs.

You have your mind on computers, it seems.

I could say the same about you.

You mentioned that you fantasize during work hours about cuddling
with your boss?

ugh. Yes. I am disgusted.

Possibly your sex life are related to this.

Yipes! I am leaving.

Is it because of hang-ups you have that you say you are leaving?

No, I just want to get out of here. You are not helping, and
making me more depressed. I am going to go take more bites out of
co-worker’s sandwiches.

Are you depressed often?

Bye

My secretary will send you a bill.

Bill? go to hell.

Perhaps you could avoid such unwholesome thoughts.

bye

Bye bye.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
The end. Not a bad session!

I am particularly proud of this line:

"You have your mind on computers, it seems."

"I could say the same about you."

man, that is funny on so many levels.






Comments:
here's some props to you for almost making me pee in my pants a little when i read that! that reall takes the cake in my book. the whole cake.
 
My favorite part was when the pyschiatrist brought up your sex life out of the blue. How forward of him.
 
This MD is a quack. I would like to speak with him.
 
that def. had me laughing out loud at work! thanks!!

i'm curious why it's assumed this psychotherapist is a male?? could it be because there's no understanding of what fooie is feeling or thinking?
 
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