Wednesday, April 04, 2007

I witnessed something fantastic yesterday

I was very fortunate yesterday to see someone’s wheel fall of their car while driving it.

Actually, I got to see the aftermath, I wasn’t fortunate enough to see the wheel spin off the hub and continue to go the direction the car was headed. That would have been a little too good to be true.

Here is the scene:
I came to a stop light in upper-downtown Indianapolis, and I looked to my left, and I see a car midway through a right turn and it has no driver-side front tire. The driver was looking around as though he didn’t understand why his car wasn’t moving. I see the hub and brake rotor of the driver side front spinning, as if he thought it just needed a little more gas. I then look to the right and saw the tire in the middle of a busy intersection as if it kept going straight after the rest of the car turned. Classic.

Here is an illustration of my perspective from my truck window when I pulled up.









What is not shown in the illustration is the 40 other cars that this calamity was blocking.

After I pieced-together what had happened, I had a good laugh. I wasn’t laughing at someone’s misfortune, I was just laughing at the outrageous circumstances. It reminds me of the classic shots in car-chase movies where the hubcaps roll off of the car and keep going, except this was the entire wheel, which at least a 100 times more comical.

Then things got even better! The passenger, who looked like Bubb Rubb*, slowly got out as if there was no emergency, walked around the car, looked at the wheel, and acknowledged that it indeed fell off. He showed absolutely no sign of surprise or worry. Then, he just stood there and stared at it for at least 30 seconds. It was the middle of rush-hour!

I really wished that I would have harassed him while he was standing there. I think a smartass remark like “Hey man, I think your wheel might have fallen off!” would have been so well-timed and sarcastic it might have made me pee in my pants.

I loved the part where he stood motionless the most because it was the exact opposite of what I would do. I later thought about how I would react. I think my reaction would begin with me jumping out and saying, “Holy shit! Your mother-fucking wheel came off!” Then I would frantically scramble around and try to do what I could to get the car and wheel out of the way of traffic.

That is all I got for now. This blog could have been doctored-up, so re-read it and pretend that all of the wheels came off at once, and then the steering wheel came off in the driver’s hands, which made him go cross-eyed.



* Please do yourself a favor and watch the Bubb Rubb video on YouTube.com if you haven’t already done so.

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Comments:
Good story. I liked the part where the wheel fell off.

Not that this has anything to do with wheels, but I've had two different cars catch on fire. The first one was caused by a greasy rag that I had (stupidly) put between the tailpipe and gas tank. I still remember the look of horror of passers-by as they gesticulated wildly, mouthing the words "your car is on fire".

-K.
 
k's story reminds me of two overheated engine stories and my reactions to them.

1. I was shotgun and smoke started whisping from the steering column. In a normal tone, pointing I remarked to the driver "Is that supposed to be smoking?" at which point he looked at me and laughed at my calm tone. The hood erupted in steam/smoke not long after.

2. I was driving in a carpool of volleyball players. My engine overheated and as we exited the highway, the steam started pooring out. I put my arm out the window and made the downward pulling motion of a train conducter blowing the whistle and yelled "hooo hooo!" pretending I was driving a steam powered locomotive. We left that car at a gas station and never saw it again.
 
many moons ago i was on my way back to school and by chance look to my right and in mcdonalds drive thru is david mcgloflin and the whole wheel and everything on the front of his caddy was kinda hanging off and he was just standing there lookin at it
 
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